End (of line) Game

End (of line) Game

As the latest Avengers film hits movie theatres across the planet we take a look at what superheroes have the skills to make it in our industry





Ant Man

Ant Man.

Not the Paul Rudd character from the movie (who’s not exactly a genius). Instead Hank Pym, the original Ant Man, would be a real asset to any distribution operation. After all, he invented a way to fit an entire building into his suitcase. Imagine how small your shipping costs would be!



In the comics the sister of metal-covered X-Man Colossus is known for her teleporting abilities. She uses a ‘stepping disc’ to transport people and objects around the world (and sometimes backwards or forwards in time too). So say goodbye to trucks and boats for your pallets and hello to instantaneous delivery times.



There have been a couple of cinematic versions of this character– the speedster making both the Avengers and X-Men teams. While machine wrapping is known for overall consistency and speed compared to hand wrapping we’d have to make an exception if it was Quicksilver doing the wrapping. This guy would have the day’s work done in the time it takes you to check your emails for the latest Binder.

Machine Man  

Machine Man.

With all kinds of high-tech equipment in his android body, (extendable arms, antigravity discs etc) we’re sure Machine Man would have a pallet wrapping programme and equipment ready for distribution centre work. However it’s worth considering if your team likes being called ‘fleshy ones’ and ‘meatsacks’ by the frequently obnoxious robot before hiring him.



As Black Panther’s sister (and princess of Wakanda) Shuri has her hands full with plenty of royal appearances, death fights etc. However we’d be happy to have her on our R&D team. She’s an incredible scientist and those trains running under Wakanda were pretty freaking neat.



The also-rans

Mister Fantastic. He can stretch even further than Nanowrap and his obvious intellect would be great for sorting out all the finer details of logistics challenges. But he’s a bit preoccupied with fixing the universe most days.

Nightcrawler. The X-Man can teleport. However when he does he also emits a terrible stench. Which in our opinion would almost be as bad as someone heating up fish curry in the staff room microwave.

Taskmaster. While he can remember any physical move perfectly the first time, Taskmaster’s creepy costume is probably an OSH hazard. And he’s a villain too. So, based solely on the disastrous effect it would have on team morale, we can’t possibly recommend him.

Mjölnir. Thor’s hammer would be very, very handy for wrapping pallets. Yes, technically it’s not a ‘hero’. But Thor would probably be useless and surely the H.R department can find someone ‘worthy’ to lift his hammer for some pallet work?

The Hulk. Pros: Very strong, can move pallets around easily. Cons: If a forklift backs over his foot he’ll go into an insane rage and destroy the building and surrounding city.

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Our five favourite Marvel distribution superheroes

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